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This radical and sudden change turns him from a compassionate seeker of knowledge into a murderer, bent on chaos and destruction. He refuses the call to action that will lead to the journey that will change his life forever. We can even teach other men how to become invisible. I will now show you the ingredients that led to my invisibility.

When I turned invisible, it took a lot longer, but it was just as painful. The hero sees this desolation, and he knows that things must change, but he does not take action. He remains invisible.♦◊♦It took our good Dr Griffin quite some time to discover the exact formula for invisibility, but you and I can recreate it any time that we want. Even though each of us can become invisible, each of us has a unique path to transparency. Take a look at your life and see if any of these elements are in your life at this time. As Lennon said, life kept on going while I was making plans, hatching schemes and building dreams.

Beyond that, and you’re venturing into creepy territory. No matter what you’re into, there are other folks who are into that too. Discover and learn or rediscover a way to connect to the Source. For there to be a Resurrection, the Hero must die a figurative death.

I need you to age gracefully and with all the qualities of a man, not a boy. The way to build that strong, unshakeable social network is by being a true friend to those who have earned it. In the movie, Dr Griffith is on his deathbed, a fatal shot drains his life away. The bones, the muscles, the tendons, the veins, the skin, the man. For you to become fully visible, a part of you must die.

I hit the ground running, signed up for match.com, created a profile and expected the emails and winks to start rushing in.

Imagine my surprise when they did not come immediately. I would log in each morning, right after my workout, and see the empty Inbox and I would die a little inside. What you need to realize is that this is a long term game.

As men over 40, there comes a time in our life when we begin to feel this invisibility overcome us. In the beginning of the Hero’s Journey, we have the wasteland. The awkwardness of my teens and the partying of my twenties had led to the sowing wild oats of my thirties.

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All I knew was, that as a man, I had to take action. I rushed out into the world, signed up for dating services, started going out again, and the pain only increased. You can have a great social life, you can start dating again.

Become a man who has friends and make sure that they are proud to call you their friend. Remember that you are cradled in the arms of a Universe that loves you. Should these steps prove too difficult, that’s okay.

With all death there is a final breath, and you must learn to focus on yours. A man’s gotta know his limitations, as Clint Eastwood would say.

Here are some tips on how to ensure you enjoy your adventure of dating after 40, not dread the next coffee date.

After all, not only is there the possibility of being swept off your feet by a romantic, loving man, there’s the chance of being swept over the cliff of heartbreak.

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